Like Tamera, I'm Free to Be Me

I watched Tia &Tamera's reality show tonight for the first time this season. On this particular episode, Tia confronts Tamera about losing herself in her role as wife and mother since she's had her son. Tia remembers when Tamera was loose, free, dressing her age and having fun, but Tamera has a totally different recollection of that time in her life. See what Tia  didn't know is Tamera was depressed, struggling to find happiness, and not herself at all. That realization stunned Tia but more importantly I think it set Tamera free. Tamera was free to tell her sister how just how different they were even though their roles were technically the same.

 Motherhood affects people in different ways. Tia worked hard to get her sexy back and why wouldn't she? At the time she was the sexy wife of an NFL player on a TV show that was at the top of it's game (no pun intended) but Tamera's projects didn't necessarily require that persona, so maybe she didn't feel the pressure to get back to pre-baby weight and wear the short skirts or whatever. Neither approach is wrong, it's about what feels comfortable for you. We get so caught up in what other's think, that we forget who we are, what we want, and what we need. To me that's when we really lose ourselves because we are putting up fronts.

 I understand how both women feel, I was never skinny, and due to my excessive "all-day" sickness, I weighed less than normal during my pregnancy, so no pressure for me. I also took the "I'm someone's mama now" approach so I wanted to be careful what I put out there. Again, it's all about comfort and what work's for you. Just because you love me and "think" I need to be a certain way doesn't mean it's what I think. It goes both ways, you are no less of a loving mom because  you like to get dressed up and go out once and a while. It's about knowing what works for you and your family atmosphere.  I love me and I embrace everything about me from the chick that likes designer handbags and funky clothes to the mama that has to put on sneakers to chase her kid around the park for an hour. To me, that's truly being free!