The Tiger Woods saga continues

This Tiger Woods mess keeps getting deeper and deeper, literally. Various media outlets are reporting that one of Tiger Wood's tramps (yes I said tramps), has reportedly issued claims of a giving birth to a 9 year old love child with Woods, a son to be exact. According to the Huffington Post article, porn queen(OMG.. is this really a title people are proud of??) Devon James stated she had their "love child" in 2001. Is she kidding? I mean, not many porn stars are known for their discretion so I find it hard to believe that Tiger Woods, the most famous athlete in the world, can have a child in secret with anyone, let alone a porn star. I know it was years before we were forced to hear the sordid details of his many indiscretions with other women but this is too much. These women will stop at nothing.

I'm sure if this child exists, paternity has certainly been established by now, at least I hope so. What does she expect to gain by releasing these statements now? Money? Fame? I hate when people use others, especially children, for their own monetary gain, it's just sick. I don't know how true this story is but if it is, I wonder do these people ever consider the consequences of their actions. Not only does this child have to deal with his mom being a TV "personality", now he has to deal with public scrutiny because his mom couldn't keep her trap shut.

Time to let go of the "old stuff"

I posted something similar to this on my facebook wall last week but I thought it warranted a second post so here goes.

Everyone holds on to "old stuff", including me, but I'm trying to train myself so this is how this post came about. I think it's important to realize that everything that happens to us does so for a reason. While we may not understand it at the time, the reason tends to reveal itself at some later point in our lives.

So, we have to let go of the "old stuff" since holding on does us no good anyway. How many new relationships will we ruin by holding on to past experiences. We have to let it go, not for the other person, but for ourselves. Whatever the person did to break your heart or negatively affect your self-esteem, LET IT GO. We shouldn't let others steal our joy. Bitter hearts block blessings, so heal yourself today and let whatever it is go.

A woman scorned

By now most of you have probably heard about the "jilted" lover's billboard revenge. If not, I will summarize it the best that I can. YaVaughnie Wilkins had a long term affair with Oracle software President (and member of President Obama's Economic Advisory board) Charles Phillips which apparantly didn't end on good terms. So in the ultimate act of revenge, YaVaughnie decides to out her former lover by purchasing billboards in 3 major cities, including Atlanta and New York, of her and "her" man while they were together. She went further to create a website which has since been shut down. I won't go into further details, the story can be viewed in it's entirety on the NY Daily news website.

It's no secret that a woman scorned can be your worst enemy, but was this really necessary? What did this woman really expect out of this? While she may have sought the ultimate revenge on this man for whatever reason, did she forget that she was a part of this seedy relationship as well? True she got back at him and publicly humiliated him and his entire family, but what does this say about her? While he may be a dog, what does that really make her? She just publicly admitted to knowingly having an affair with a married man, UGH.

First, let me say this, I have done some stupid things in my life and made some very bad choices and most were emotional. Now, here's my two cents: As women, we need to be careful how we carry ourselves. Our choices and behavior carry a lot weight and ultimately speak to our true character. We should think before we act. If someone makes you angry, our first defense is to retaliate, it's normal and human nature. But, we need to ask ourselves some questions first:

1. Is this really worth it?
2. What was my part in this situation?
3. Can I go to jail for my actions?
4. When this is over, will I still be able to look myself in the mirror and know I would do things the same way again if I had to?
5. Could my actions possibly jeopardize my future?

If you don't like the answer to these questions, DON'T DO IT!! It really is that simple. I know it's 2010, but we are still held to different standards from men. Sure some women will praise her for her antics but I'm not one of them. This stuff may be cute when you're young but now as an adult. She's over 40 and should know better. These things always turn out the same way: He will go on to bigger and better things and she will only be known as the woman who slept with a dog and told everyone about it.

Thought of the Day: Should we care that he loves her?

Why is it that when a man tells his woman he's been cheating on her she immediately wants to know two things: How long? and Does he love her? Should you really care if he loves the other woman or not? Does his admission of love make the act any less hurtful? Does it ease your pain? I wouldn't think so. While the question may be a natural reaction, I'm not sure that I care if you love this other chick or not.

Women make it too easy for men to recover from such transgressions by denying (whether truthfully or not) their love for the other woman. Once a man says "I don't love her, I love you", women fall right back into their arms. On the other hand, if he says "yes, I love her", women immediately want to know why and proceed to try to "fix" themselves to seek acceptance from the cheater. Here's a note: when a man cheats on you, the problem may very well be within him and not you.

We as women should love ourselves enough to know that no matter what we have going for us and what we provide, if he wants to cheat he will. No explanation necessary. If a real problem between you exists, decide if the relationship is actually worth saving and make moves accordingly. But please don't justify his actions by finding fault with yourself. You will spend the rest of your life in constant repair mode possibly to no avail.

Tiger's women: Home wreckers anonymous!

How many more women have to come forth with their allegations of affairs with Tiger Woods before we say enough is enough? It's obvious that these women are after some sort of financial gain. Why else would they even speak about their "relationships" with this married man.

Most of the negativity is being placed on Tiger's doorsteps because he's the public figure, but shouldn't these women suffer some sort of ridicule as well? Why does society put so much stock in the testimonies of these home wreckers? Shouldn't we turn our backs on them and say keep your trashiness to yourself ladies, we're not interested? Instead, we rush out to read the latest blog (thank you by the way) or to pick up the latest gossip rag which adds to their ill-gotten gain.

We know these chicks have been paid very well for their stories but I still feel sorry for them. They are really sad and desperate individuals, how else can we explain their behavior. Unlike some mistresses, these females knew this man was married with a family (& money) but they chose to have sexual relations with him anyway. Really, how low is their self-esteem. Well if they didn't know before they will soon because in a few months the story will die down, Tiger will go on with life (assuming his wife stays with him of course), Elin will still have all of the financial perks, but these women will forever be known as the one time mistress of Tiger Woods. That's it. What then? Nothing and that's exactly what they deserve. Then again, maybe they can start a club something like home-wreckers anonymous-where one time mistresses meet to discuss the culmination of their trifling ways.

What was the "mystery" behind Steve McNair's death??

Last night, Dateline NBC aired their much anticipated story of Steve McNair titled The Mysterious Death of a Titan. I’m not sure what was so “mysterious” about his death, but anyway. The story documented his rise to fame from Mt. Olive Mississippi to leading the Tennessee Titans to the 2000 Superbowl and then ultimately his untimely death at the hands of his mistress of 6 months Sahel(Jenny) Kazemi. This story has received lots of publicity in the past months but I still find the story fascinating and almost shocking to some degree. I say shocked because, it appears that this man led an entirely separate life from his wife and children presumably in the public eye.

Dateline interviewed the former roommate/best friend of Kazemi who gave a first hand account of the relationship between the two and basically described the relationship as normal and loving. Eddie George,friend and former teammate of Steve McNair talked about Steve the athlete , philanthropist and friend. The McNair family minister spoke of Steve’s plight as a person in the public eye struggling with his family obligations and his personal vices (i.e. his affairs with women). Each of these people knew a different side of Steve but no on knew his callous actions would lead to a traumatic ending on July 4th, 2009.

In addition to friends and family, Dateline also interviewed Brenda L. Thomas, former personal assistant to NBA player Stephon Marbury and author of three best sellers including Every Woman’s Got a Secret. Ms. Thomas offered insight into these “types” of relationships based on her experience in the business. She suggested that the downfall of the relationship was due to neither party playing by the rules. The rules being: Steve didn’t set the appropriate boundaries and Jenny didn’t understand that Steve would never leave his wife for her. This was very interesting to me.

Are there really rules for cheating men and their mistresses? Is the woman on the side supposed to assume that she will never get the man? Should the man make sure the rules are set before getting involved in an extramarital affair? I’m not sure, but to me, it would be easier to stay at home (a lot safer at least). Did Kazemi’s age play a part in her dream of a fairy tale ending? I guess in a way, Ms. Thomas was correct because if McNair and Kazemi observed these “rules” from the beginning, they both would be alive today, maybe.